Every child is special:

Every child is special and unique in their own way. I, personally have learned so much from raising my 6-year-old Autistic son. He has taught me to be more patient, understanding and aware. My little Sebastian is an amazing loving boy. However; there were a lot of things I wish I knew when it came to parenting him. Here are some of the things of what I have learned so far.

1. Stimming – It is a repetitive performance of certain physical movements or vocalization as a form of behavior by persons with Autism or neurodevelopmental conditions. This behavior is thought to serve as a variety of functions, such as calming and expression of feelings. Preferred ways of stimming can change over time as it depends on the individual. As long as the stim does not harm the child or others around them, it should be embraced. 

Stimming in different Forms:

Stimming can be visual – It can be looking at bright colors, cool designs or looking at something upside down or from a different angle. It can also be from watching something very closely. 

Stimming can be tactile – This is when the child has the feeling of something on the skin. This can be from walking on different textures, ripping things and putting them back together.

Stimming with the whole body – It can be running and jumping on things, spinning in cirlces, hand flapping, climbing and swinging.

Stimming can be vocal – It can have the child repeating the same word or phrases, humming, laughing or squealing.

Stimming can be auditory – It can be having the child slapping surfaces, clicking their tongue, playing an instrument, listening to the same song, watching the same show over and over. 

2. Worrying about what others think:

I am going to be honest, I use to worry about what people would think. My son would go and climb on peoples couches  or grab their snacks. As a parent, I try to direct and guide him to not do such things. But it was difficult. I would become embarrassed because my son would be the only one doing this while the other children were more at ease. I felt myself comparing him to other children. I have learned to let that part of my thoughts go and accept and educate those who do not understand. 

3. Eloping:

I didn’t realized I needed to have some running shoes on me when I go to family functions as my son tries to elope any chance he gets. Eloping in the Autism world is common. This is where children run or wanders away from caregivers or secured locations. Many people don’t know why children with Autism do this but they believe it is due to them just enjoying running and exploring new places. The thing that gives caregivers anxiety is that children with Autism may not have sense of awareness and that could be dangerous. 

4. Sports for Special Needs: 

My husband and I are big football fans. We had dreams of putting our son in football when we found out we were having a boy. After his diagnosis, we still have plans of putting our little man in sports. There are plenty activities that children with Autism can do. I did not know at the time. I have learned about agencies that cater to children with Autism to do sports. Where I reside in California there is a baseball league called The Miracle League that is designed specifically for children with disabilities. I have signed my son up for the past 3 years and he loves it. Organizations like this exist across the nation. If not, don’t worry, there are other sports to consider such as swimming, golf, karate, gymnastics, track and more. 

5. Meltdowns:

Meltdowns happen with the child or teenager with autistic feel completely overwhelmed, lose control of their behavior, and find it very hard to clam themselves down. Meltdowns are a sign of distress. Meltdowns might include behaviors like rocking, crying, hitting or withdrawing. Many times my son would have a meltdown in the middle of a store or at a family event. I have learned to get down on the floor with him when we are at home or sit on the floor. I try my best to get on his level and talk to him calmly. Sometimes I will hug him if he allows me to. I did not know this at the time about my son being overwhelmed in public places when his meltdowns would occur. This was because he was overstimulated. 

Question: Moms, what was something that you have learned when it came to having a child with Autism?