So your raising a little girl?

When I told that my first child was going to be a girl, I was thrilled. To be honest, a healthy baby and safe pregnancy is the most important, but I have always dreamed of having a little boy first. When I was told it was a girl, I was elated. All these ideas came to me about us having a girl’s day when she got older or being in the kitchen making our favorite meal together. Just being her mother was the upmost biggest blessing I could have ever received. As she got older, I realize there is so much more to being a girl mom than this. Here are 10 things, I realize and learned from being a mom to a little girl.

10 Things to know from being a girl mom:

1. Over-praising her – I use to have have this thing about praising her on literally everything. I did not want you think I did not notice even the small achievements. I know as a parent this could be hard because we want to recognize our children’s littlest achievements, but this could be harmful in the long run. This is because children can become complacent and less motivated to work harder when as task is even remotely difficult for them to do on their own.
2. Tell her she is beautiful – Don’t ignore her appearance, but instead compliment her mind. Instead of saying “You hair is really pretty” or “You have a nice dress on” say “You solved that puzzle on your own” or “You made a great decision today.” Part of building up her self-esteem is not just about psychical appearance, but also stimulating her mind.
3. Teach her about positive body image – It is important to teach her that all bodies and skin colors are beautiful and every body is unique in their own way. There are numerous ways to do this such as positive body affirmations. She can write down positive affirmation the downfall of social media, and avoiding comparisons to others.
4. Expecting to be like you – Just remember, our girls are their own people. I am going to be honest, I had my daughter do tasks and she would say something was difficult for her to do. I remember asking her why? I was immediately taken back to when I was her age doing things on my own. I have since learned that she is her own person. She is more a leader and outspoken than I ever was at her age. I have since pulled back and allowed her to be her own person.
5. Encourage her to solve problems on her own – As parents we are quick to want to try to help out, but it important from refraining to. I use to do this. Now I just encourage her to use her skills that she has learned. I do remind her that it is okay to make a mistake, but it is important to try to learn from them. By solving problems on her own this can boost her confidence and self-esteem.
6. Talking to her about her menstrual cycle – This is a given when it comes to having girls. The first time I talked with my daughter about this she was 9. My husband and I have actually noticed differences when it came to her body. She was developing breasts. I bought her a starter kit for when she first starts her period. It is a little bag with fresh underwear and a pad. I did explain that this could happen at any time. I did answer all her questions to the best of my ability. Let’s just say she was mortified to lean about what a menstrual cycle was.
7. Lead by example – Parents are their children first role models. It is important to show girls that they are strong, smart and beautiful. This can be shown as simple as dressing yourself for the day even if you not going any where. Just taking the time out of your day to dress yourself so you look presentable for what the day brings can encourage your daughter to follow your lead.
8. Set clear boundaries with your daughter – Sometimes it is difficult to say “no” to her, trust me I understands. By setting boundaries, you are teaching her to exercise self-discipline and self-control. Teach her what is acceptable and what is not. She needs to understand how to other people’s boundaries as well as her own. Be firm! and try not to give in.
9. Spend quality time with her – As moms, we wear many hats, (the nurse, the teacher, the chief, the housemaid) the list can go on. My 8-year-old daughter said to me before, “Mommy, all I want to do is for you to play Barbies with me.” Don’t get so caught up in life that you forget to enjoy the little things in life. Remember, one day she is going to grow older and want to do her own thing and maybe hang out with her friends more.
10. Help her understand why she sometimes gets left out – As children, they may not understand why this happens and expect to be picked every time for something. It is important for her to understand in life, she is not always going to get picked for every game or invited for to every party. This is okay. It does happen. It is important to look on the bright side of every situations.

Question: What things have you learned from raising a girl?